Life story

Françoise was born just off the Place de la Bastille, in Paris, on 24 September 1945, to Marcel and Marthe Gaudron. She was the baby of the family – her oldest sister Janine, was 19 when Françoise was born, her brother Paul was 17 and her sister Marie-Thé was 12. Françoise grew up in the same house where she was born, in the Bastille area of Paris. For university, she attended one of France’s Grandes Ecoles, the Haute Ecole de Commerce, for a degree in Business Studies, with German and English. 

After university, she moved to the UK and began working as a research assistant at Bath University. That’s where she first met John Rutherford – she described him as arriving in the office in motor bike gear but not the cool kind you get nowadays. But as they got to know each other, they fell in love and began making plans to make a life together. They got married in 1968.

John’s career in anthropology research took them first to Illinois in the USA, then to Hawaii and to the island of Bougainville, off the east coast of Papua New Guinea. Their first daughter Marion was born in Honolulu on 16 February 1971. After their return to the UK, their second daughter Juliette was born in Edinburgh in December 1972.

In the 1970s, as the children grew up, Françoise and John grew apart, and in 1979 they separated.  John  – who became known as ‘Jack’ – stayed close to his daughters, while Françoise juggled her energies between working and being a loving and thoughtful mum to her two girls.

Françoise always took a keen interest in her daughters’ every day lives – their friendships, their interests, their hopes and fears. In their teenage years, the house in Leamington Terrace was a social hub for all their friends and acquaintances, and Marion met Aaron, who was to become her lifelong partner. Françoise, Marion and Juliette soon started spending Christmases with Aaron and his family – a tradition that would last throughout Françoise’s life.

Françoise worked at Lothian Regional Council until 1992, where she made many lifelong friends – including Barbara Darcy, Graham Strachan, Sue Reeves, Mary Connor. The 1980s was also the time when she forged strong friendships with Jo, Gail, Penny and Fiona, who jokingly referred to themselves as ‘the coven’. Françoise found a new partner in Murray Dodds, and they spent many happy times together. Sadly Murray died of cancer in 1989, and after a period of deep mourning, Françoise began to think of making a change.

In 1992, after the girls had left home, she moved to Brussels to work for the European Commission. After a brief return to Edinburgh in 1995, she went back to Brussels and stayed there for another 4 years. During this period, she met Ralph, and he became her partner of several years. His children Yassin and Nathalie have fond memories of Françoise from this time.

In 1997, her first grandchild was born to Marion and Aaron. Marion gave birth to Nayan on 1 October, and this was the start for Françoise of many happy years as a doting grandmother. After her return to Edinburgh in 2000, she was blessed by the arrival of another two grandchildren. Kiran was born in May 2001, and Jai in June 2007. Françoise was also fond of and close to their cousins, Devan and Finlay, born to Marnie and Davi in April 2000, and Maia and Leela, born to Gaby and Ash in May 2003 and July 2006.

Françoise worked for a few more years before retiring in 2004, when she was able to devote her energies to family and friends. She loved taking her grandchildren and their cousins out and about to various activities and events – from the science festival to football, museums, beach trips, nature walks, the book festival, music and films – as well as celebrating their birthdays, sharing quiet moments with them at home, and being part of all the daily routines of their lives.

She took up tai chi, an interest she shared with her daughter Juliette. She also made regular visits to Cambridge, where Juliette was now living, and visited several times with Marion and the grandchildren. Juliette moved back to Edinburgh in 2016, and they continued to practice tai chi together. It was also through tai chi that Juliette met David – they began dating in June 2017 and got engaged in December 2018. Françoise and David became firm friends, and David soon became part of the family.

Françoise also kept up with other hobbies – art classes, German classes, book clubs – and continued to make new friends wherever she went. Last summer she was taking regular walks with her old friend Barbara and her new friend Miriam, as well as meeting up regularly with her children and grandchildren, for walks and social events within Covid rules.

We were all shocked to hear of her cancer diagnosis last year in November – Juliette and David decided to go ahead with their wedding plans despite the Covid restrictions, and Françoise was delighted to be part of their wedding on 2 January. It was a lovely event at St Ann’s church in Corstorphine, with 16 family members present, and friends and family joining in on Zoom from around the world.

In her last few weeks, she was well cared for at the Marie Curie hospice, who ensured she was comfortable and in no pain. She had daily visits from her daughters and their partners, and her grandchildren also visited to say their last goodbyes. Marion and Aaron, Juliette and David, were with her when she died. She was peaceful and at peace.